Chapter 141

I sink down onto the sofa, clutching my mug of chamomile tea, still wearing a stupid, post-orgasmic smile on my face despite having showered and changed into my pajamas since I got home an hour ago. But it has been a long time since I had sex of any kind. And I haven’t had sex that good in … Well, now that I come to think of it, forever. Elijah and I always had a powerful physical connection, and in our early years together, there were no issues at all in that department. We began to lose our way when the fertility problems started. Sex became scheduled rather than spontaneous. Then, when the doctors told me I wouldn’t get pregnant no matter how much sex we had, something inside me died. I struggled to readjust. If I couldn’t have a baby, why was I having sex? Flawed logic, but I was a mess at the time. Verona’s illness came too soon after, and I couldn’t bear the thought of burdening him further with my neediness. I thought I was being kind, doing him a favor by suppressing my own ne