#Chapter 6: Fragments

Celeste I couldn’t hide the secret from Fiona now that I had plans to go to the ball. “I'm going to the ball,” I confessed to her that afternoon as we walked to the campus center in between classes. Her eyes went wide. “Really, Celeste?” I nodded. “But I'll be wearing a mask.,” I added. I paused before uttering my next words: “And, Fiona… you can't spend much time talking to me.” A flicker of confusion, combined with hurt, crossed her face. “W-Why?” she murmured. “That's... private,” I replied curtly, immediately regretting my tone. I saw the flash of hurt in her eyes, but she quickly brushed it off. “All right. But we're going dress shopping. You can't go to the ball in your regular clothes.” A few days later, we found ourselves in the town's dress boutique. To keep my identity a secret, I kept my hood up and a surgical mask over my face. “I still don’t get why you’re going to such efforts to hide your identity,” she said as we walked up to the little dress shop on the small shopping strip in town. “It’s not like you’re not allowed…” I swallowed. “I’m not allowed,” I said. “Jack would kill me.” Technically, I wasn’t lying; Jack had already made it clear to me that I shouldn’t go to events like this. He always said that I would be an embarrassment to him, and I honestly agreed with him. I was an embarrassment. Fiona groaned. “I hate him,” she growled. “Seriously, Fiona, you have got to get away from that jerk.” Fiona was right, but she didn’t understand the full story. Ever since our parents died, Jack was all that I had. Yes, he was a controlling jerk, but he protected me. He kept me fed, clothed, and kept a roof over my head. In high school, he stood up for me against bullies. Sure, he was the biggest bully at home, but… I needed him. “Sorry,” Fiona continued, clearing her throat. “I know it’s complicated.” “It’s alright, Fifi,” I said, smiling beneath my surgical mask. “You have every right to hate him.” We approached the store and headed inside. The whole store smelled like perfume, and the racks were full of beautiful gowns. Each year, this store put on a huge sale for the Moon Goddess Festival ball, and it was the place to get a dress. The store was already full of other girls who were looking for their perfect dresses. Fiona picked out several dresses for me to try, each one prettier than the last. “Try this one first,” she grinned, holding out a pretty cornflower blue dress. “Ooh, and this one second.” The second dress was dark purple; they both looked rather form fitting, a far cry from what I would normally wear. I blushed as I took the pile of dressing into the fitting room. The first dress was too small, and Fiona had to run to the rack to get a bigger size. Just then, as I waited for Fiona to return, I overheard an awfully familiar voice. “A large?” I knew that shrill voice. Sabrina. “Yeah,” Fiona retorted, her tone of annoyance carrying through the fitting room curtain. “What of it?” “Nothing, nothing… It’s just that, well, if someone is wearing a dress in a size large, then they probably shouldn’t be wearing something so… form fitting. No one wants to see fat stomach rolls.” I felt my throat close, and my eyes began to well up with tears. Sabrina’s words stung. “Just get the dress,” Fiona ordered. “It’s not up to you. And besides… Greek goddesses all had tummy rolls. Haven’t you seen statues of Aphrodite?” Sabrina just laughed disdainfully. A few moments later, I saw Fiona’s face poke through the curtain. “Here,” she whispered, offering me a gentle smile as she held the dress out for me. “You’re gonna look even sexier than Aphrodite.” I forced a smile, blinking back my tears as I took the cornflower blue dress out of Fiona’s hand. “Thank you,” I murmured. I slipped the dress on, feeling much better now that it fit. But I didn’t look in the mirror; in fact, I got dressed with my back turned to the mirror, and only peeked out of the fitting room enough to let Fiona see the dress. “Well?” I asked, running my hands along the silky fabric. “Is it okay?” Fiona’s blue eyes widened. “Oh, Celeste,” she murmured, cupping her hands around her cheeks. “You’re so pretty. That dress hugs your curves beautifully.” I blushed. Up ahead, there was a mirror hung up against a square pillar, and from afar I could see my reflection; the dress really did look nice. It had short sleeves that showed off my arms, and a plunging neckline. It fell down to my ankles, and was cut on the bias, so it really did hug my curves well. If I wasn’t wearing a hat to cover my hair and a surgical mask to cover my face, I thought that maybe I wouldn’t totally hate myself. “You like it?” Fiona asked. I nodded, blinking back more tears. Up ahead, however, Sabrina was leaning on the counter. Her eyes wandered spitefully up and down my body; while Fiona’s back was turned, Sabrina smirked, slowly shaking her head, and gave me a thumbs down. I instantly felt my heart sink, and I quickly whipped around to go back into the fitting room. “Celeste?” Fiona asked, jogging after me. “What’s wrong?” I shook my head. “It’s not right,” I replied. “I look awful.” “Celeste…” Fiona grabbed my wrist and pulled me back out. “You really look stunning. What changed your mind?” I opened my mouth to respond, but froze when the door chimed, announcing new arrivals. I felt my face get hot. Even Sabrina whipped her head around and her face blanched when she saw the trio that entered. She began primping her hair as she leaned on the counter, using her elbows to push her breasts together. It was Enzo and Nina; but they weren’t alone. My heart skipped a beat when Matt walked in behind them. He was friends with Enzo? I hadn't known that, or I supposed that I had known a bit, since he was on the hockey team with Enzo. But seeing him there, his tall frame casually leaning against a rack of dresses caused a flutter of fear to run through me. It was a stark reminder of the world outside our online chats, a world where I was the chubby girl with freckles and curly hair. My face went pale, and I quickly retreated to the changing room, pulling the curtain shut with more force than necessary and leaving Fiona standing there, confused. But even in the confines of the small room, I could still picture Matt's carefree smile. Nina’s soft voice, followed by a teasing remark from Enzo about one of the mannequins and accompanied by a heart laugh from Matt, made my stomach drop. The harsh reality of our worlds colliding sent chills down my spine. Once again, I was reminded of Matt’s popularity; his friendship with the two most beloved students at our little university. I was not a part of that world, and I never would be.