Chapter 412

“Kisses like a damn demon and that just proves that I need to stay far, far away from him.” Zoë cocked an eyebrow at her. “How do you figure?” “Well, isn’t it obvious? If he kisses like that then he is obviously going to be a stud in the sack and you know what that means…” “Um, hot sex and orgasms for days?” “No, it means he’s just like Callum and Ryan and Garth. Hot, sexy arseholes. It’s like the crazy/hot scale that guys use for girls.” “What?” “You know, on How I Met Your Mother? The crazy/hot scale except it’s the arsehole/orgasm scale. You have to balance how many arseholes you can deal with to how many orgasms you can get out of him. Obviously, the more orgasms the more of an arsehole he is allowed to be.” “You’re fucking drunk,” Zoë said with a laugh. “Why yes. Yes, I am. Regardless of my inebriated state, the arsehole/orgasm scale is a thing.” “So how would Jake stack up on this arsehole/orgasm scale?” “Maximum orgasms,” Emma said decisively. “Which probably means maximum arseh