#Chapter 157 – To Stay or to Go

“Mama?” The boys come tottering down the stairs. Too soon, just…too soon. Still kneeling on the floor, I raise my shaking hands to my eyes, working to wipe away the tears, but they’re still coming. Shit, shit – no part of me wants my boys to see me cry, but I just can’t stop – Two little arms wrap around my shoulders from the left side, resting a little brown head against my shoulder. Sniffing, I reach a hand up to wrap around a little forearm as the other twin comes to hug me on my other side. I’m a little twin sandwich, squeezed between their sweet, empathetic little hearts. God, what did I ever do to deserve them? “Are you okay, mama?” Ian whispers, true concern in his voice. I clear my throat, doing my best to sound steady, but my voice trembles when I answer. “I’m going to be okay, babies. Go ahead now, let me go.” They unwrap themselves and come to stand in front of me. I look up at them and then pat the floor in front of me, where they sit down, their faces worried.