Chapter Three

Leslie almost answered the call but Luke bolted out of the bathroom with his bathrobe loosely thrown around his body, and snatched the phone from her. Leslie was stunned both by being caught with his phone and by how quick he was to jump out of the bathroom just because he heard his phone ringing. Luke avoided her eyes and sheepishly turned away to answer the call. “Hello? Yeah, I was showering.” He glanced at Leslie some more, and she looked away, trying to give him room to chat with Katie to his pleasure. He nodded and then said, “I’ll call you back later, okay?” After he hung up the call, he pursed his lips and then said, “It’s…uh, a patient. I have to go in early tomorrow.” Leslie shrugged. “It’s your job. You save lives.” He nodded. “Are you sure you’re okay?” “I’m fine. You shouldn’t worry.” He nodded slowly and then turned to go back into the bathroom, but Leslie called him back. “I saw a notification for the partner’s birthday party. Will you take me?” Luke’s face immediately became white as though he’d seen a ghost. For a few seconds, he struggled to form words, but that was all the answers that Leslie needed. He never wanted to go out in public with her. Their marriage was like a criminal affair—so to speak. No one knew, not even her parents, and most of the time, her elder brother would call to ask what she had been doing in California for the past few years and wouldn’t visit her home in NYC. “The party is…er, you know? I don’t feel like going anyway. I have some important work to handle.” “Oh, okay. That’s fine. I guess there’ll be other opportunities to go somewhere with you. I just thought that maybe…we could go public with our marriage?” Luke sucked a lungful of air. “I’ve told you how I feel about that, Leslie. I don’t want outsiders to know about us. Are you not happy this way?” ‘I’m not happy!’ she screamed in her head. ‘I’ve cried myself to sleep every night for the past two months!’ Luke treated her like she was a substitute—and she was. As much as she wanted to run away, she was hurt that she’d spent the past two years loving him so much that she’d lost herself in it. Looking into his eyes these days, she saw nothing but emptiness. There was no love in him for her—not even a single atom of affection. Prior to her discovery in the journal, she’d thought that Luke was just like that. He was a doctor who was professional and good at his job, and she’d once heard that to be that good, one had to detach oneself. Leslie quietly crawled under the covers and shut her eyes, pretending to sleep till it was morning. At daybreak, she fell asleep but was awoken by a noise. She found Luke rummaging through the drawer. “Did you find my watch?” he asked when she raised her head. “Which watch?” “The one I always wear; which other one is there?” “I don’t know. You always wear it.” Leslie said. She remembered that he’d worn the watch the previous night, but she wasn’t sure if he’d come back with it. “Well, I need it.” “What about the one I got you?” she held her breath when she asked that. She knew very well that Luke had sold all those items off online and never kept the gifts she got him. In response, he buttoned his shirt. “I don’t think I need a watch again. It’s just an accessory.” “Right.” She sucked down that pain too. Another pain she sucked down was the fact that Luke didn’t seem to notice that most of their things—especially items he’d gotten for her—were missing from the room. Did he really care at all? That morning, after he left, Leslie began her obsession again by first checking on Katie, the woman who would soon displace her like a radical in a chemical reaction. Her status update was: “I woke up to a sweet text message. Nothing like playing a naughty game with him.” A naughty game, huh? Leslie made coffee and drank it extra bitter. In the afternoon, she couldn’t take the boredom anymore. She’d gone to the museum, done a few checks, and updated the items before she came home close to evening. She was exhausted but didn’t feel like resting because each minute of idleness brought back the ugliness of her reality. She called Stephanie, her best friend. “Hey, Steph.” “Leslie,” she replied cheerily. “How are you, cupcake?” Leslie sniffled. “I’m not really okay.” “Hmm…what’s wrong? You sound like you ate a frog.” Leslie didn’t tell her much of the details but she mentioned that she had been living with Luke for the past few months and had thought that he loved her only to discover that he’s always had it for Katie. Stephanie was one of the people who’d been against her throwing herself at Luke. Of course, Luke had been the dream of every woman in college. The medical block was just a few blocks from theirs, and they ran into each other often. Stephanie had admitted that Luke was an eye candy, but after more than a dozen rejections, she’d told Leslie to give it up and not sell herself short. But Leslie had been blown away by his proposal before she could even take that advice. Telling her all that, Leslie felt Stephanie would blame her. “I can’t believe he’s still a douche after all these years.” “I’m tired of trying, Steph,” she said. “I’m leaving. I was wondering if I could stay at your place for a month before I go back to NYC.” “I would love to, but I have to move back to Florida soon. Will you come with me? My brother is having a little party for his graduation, so I want to be there.” “If there’ll be room, then yes!” “Another thing, Leslie,” Stephanie said. “Don’t ever feel bad for yourself for loving. You loved wrong, but there’s no crime in loving.” She nodded, repeating those words to herself.