Chapter 5

" The rose has thorns only for those who would gather it." - Chinese Proverb "Katrina!" Katrina turned back on the third stair and looked back at her grandmother. "You are sure you want to do this alone?" She nodded. She did not trust herself to say anything else least she lost all her confidence and her resolve and the lines that she had been practicing every day since she found out got muddled. These were the words that she had always planned to say to him but had never had the guts to do it. When it was not the guilt, it was the fear, the two forces that were always actively trying to stop her from doing what she felt was right. The two forces that had crippled her and allowed him to treat her like she was nothing, but now she would say it. Whether he wanted to or not, he would hear it. He was on her turf and the rules would now be hers to dictated. "Okay, I'll be here if you need anything." Katrina nodded and turned to resume her walk down the stairs. A bout of nervousness gripped her and quite unconsciously she found herself wiping back her now sweating palms on the black skirt of her dress. "No!" She reprimanded herself as her hands once again dropped to her sides and her back went ramrod straight, her head lifted high as she walked into the drawing-room where she knew the man was be waiting. # The drawing-room. That is, the Maracheli drawing-room masterfully finished like the rest of the house was. Huge bay windows covered in translucent white curtains allowed the light to filter in, their panels open to allow the cool breeze that brought in the scents of the valley to waft indoors. It was beautiful, Ryan admitted to himself, and the view below them even more glorious. The rocks that the cliff overlooked, the meadows, and the rushing brook that meandered beneath it all that this room built to the side of the cliff gave view to, was all so glorious, so majestic to as far as his artistic eye allow him to see it. This was the seat of power for the great moguls of the Maracheli family. Their fortress of power into which he, like the insane dog that he was had wandered into. He did not allow himself to think of his family, his stature, or even his own father's influence on the affairs of this country. The influence that had gotten him to that point to the place that he was now. No, he would not allow himself to think so. He needed all his wits about him and he needed to do this, what he had to do in his way and in his own time. As the two gilded mahogany doorways gave way in to allow his wife and the very person he had come to see, he turned around and regarded her with his usual glare. It was all he could show. Seeing her here unnerved him and as all the memories of the last six or so years rushed in, he almost lost his calm and gave in to the violence. 'Ryan!' her voice brought him out of his rumination and jolted him back to his present reality. 'Katrina...' he greeted her back, a sinister smile pervading the glare if only to unnerve her more, but she did not bat an eyelid. Instead, she regarded him pensively almost calculating as she took another step forward. 'What do you want? As I am aware you only want your child and he is not yet born, so...' 'I have no business here?' he smiled charmingly before his look turned bitter. 'Do not think that you have me in your palms now that you are carrying my child. I know what you did and if it's a war you want you will get it. Go ahead with the divorce, but know this, I will still have my child.' he added menacingly. 'Divorce you?' Katrina laughed. 'and give you an easy way out?' 'Funny, considering I already received the papers, signed by none other than you.' A look of surprise flickered on Katrina's face and Ryan took all this in with the sneer masking his anger. 'What? You do not want to divorce me now? All your acting will get you nowhere and I am never falling for your innocent act again.' he spat out and Katrina looked back incensed. 'Fine. Believe what you will. God knows I have suffered enough for it and for my stupidity and my naivety, but now, enough is enough. I will not have you treat me like crap again! I know my worth Ryan. I allowed guilt to swallow me whole but we are responsible for our own decisions. If you won't believe me when I say that I was a foolish victim of my naivete just like you were, then that's your problem. Don't pin on me.' Katrina took a deep breath to compensate for her sudden rush of words. 'As for this child, you are free to be in his life, but not as you are. You will not drink around him or me for that matter and you will act responsible. Is that clear?' Ryan regarded her with a curious gaze mesmerized by this new woman who was standing before him breathing fire and brimstone despite who she once was. He was fascinated yes, but he did not delude himself into thinking that things had changed. This was the same woman who had cost him so much in the last few years, the same woman who was the reason for his estrangement with his son, his family, and now the head of the Maracheli family who was this close to letting his dogs lose to come after him. No, he did not allude himself to think that the white witch could become an angel. An angel of vengeance perhaps with the huge angry eyes and the cute white shirt and black skirt... but even demons could hide behind a facade that was innocent just to trick you to lower your guard down and to pounce when you were not looking. 'Fine. As you wish.' he retaliated for the moment and waited to see what her reaction would be. 'Great. Feel free to show yourself out.' with that she turned around on her red kitten heels and marched angrily out of the room. The path was a long one but eventually, Ryan found himself standing before the familiar set of doors he had visited earlier. The building before him was towering, the red brick speaking of age as the two front turrets rose high into the sky to kiss its greyish ceiling. It was not going to rain, but the clouds filled the sky all the same. That was the highland climate and as the strong wind continued to howl across the street, Ryan debated with the decision to either walk up the front steps or retire back into the confines of his rather warm and quite homey hotel room. Another blast of air and his decision were made for him. The wind today was a nightmare and as much as he tried to pull his slick jacket around him it failed terribly at keeping him warm having been designed for the much more warm, more accommodating climate of the capital. One step, two steps, and soon his impatience led him to take the stairs two at a time. Part of him was escaping the harsh weather while the rest, just wanted to do this before he chickened out and changed his mind. As he came to the great doors, his hand lifted but lingered, poised to knock but not sure if that was the right thing to do here. In the end, his fist unfurled, his fingers stretched out and sprayed out on the heavy wood as he pushed one m door inwards. To his relief, the great doors cracked opened to reveal the warm interior decked in scarlet tapestries and pews made from dark mahogany wood. He had been here before, yet he had never taken the time to appreciate it, the beauty of this towering monolith erected within the central district of this highland city. He took another step forward drawn in by stained glass windows behind the gilded altar, the sound of his feet muffled slightly by the scarlet carpet spread out to the front pews only that, he didn't quite get that far as a familiar voice called out to him. "Mrs B?" he didn't quite mean it as a question but her sudden appearance flanked by two teenage girls quite surprised him. "I... I..." he tried to explain himself and his presence there but the matronly lady just smiled back. "That's okay Ryan. All are welcome." The lady was so warm, so accommodating that Ryan found himself smiling too. "Thanks. I don't know why I came here," he said turning around to slowly walk towards them. "I guess I just..." he trailed off as words failed him, finding that, he lacked a proper way to correctly express his emotions. "It's okay Ryan. Like I Said, all are welcome." "Right." he laughed lightly as fingers found their way behind his ears to ruffle his blond mop. "But the thing is, I was actually looking for you." he ended up saying awkwardly. "Oh, is that so?" She asked gently before nodding at the two girls who were flanking her. They both nodded at her and smiled at Ryan before leaving the two of them alone to talk. "So... What's on your mind today Ryan?" she said as she led him to an empty office. "I am sorry for taking your time. You must have had something lined up for now?" he said his eyes looking into the direction the girls had just left in. "Yea, but it is still early. Being a Wednesday I normally have these violin sessions but today, for some reason, they called to cancel." she said with a far and worried expression marring her face before turning back to Ryan with another smile. "but that also means that I have time before the study group officially starts." "That's where you were headed?" "Yes, we meet in the community hall next to the main sanctuary. Most of them are already present. They're just having some fun before the meeting officially starts. That's also where Janice and Bernice went to. So?" she said as she took a seat behind the desk. The room was small and the furniture old but clean nonetheless. Apart from the furniture and an old rug on the floor, the room looked mostly unoccupied and more like a janitor's closet lacking a window and all. Even so, the air was not musty thanks to the ventilation vent he could spot on the wall. " What did you have in mind? What did you want us to talk about?" Ryan drew in a deep breath looking anywhere but into the eyes of the concerned-looking Mrs. Beufont. "Where do I start?" he paused as he collected his thoughts and wits about him. "My life, my dreams, everything is in shambles. I do not know what to do." he told her. Mrs. Beufont did not say anything however as she allowed him to continue to pour out his heart undeterred. "Growing up, I had all these plans, these dreams, but little did I know what life would dish out. Right now I feel so mad at my parents, for what they did to me, for what they allowed to happen and I always wonder how different things would have been had they not interfered. " " What did they do?" Mrs. Beufont questioned in a concerned whisper. " I mean, I understand that it worked out okay for Lennita, that's my sister" he clarified "but really, an arranged marriage in this day and time! "his expression was now livid. "I understand how that can be destructive..." Mrs. Beufont shook her head in agreement. "Most people like to feel like they have a form of control or say in what happens in their lives." "Exactly." Ryan agreed with her. "and what's worse is that they kept it a secret until at that point that I found a person that I truly cared about. They had to wait until I was head over heels with her to break the news to me. And what option did I get? None! It would have been better if they had threatened to disown me. Instead, they threatened her... "he choked off as a thin film of moisture began to crowd his eyes. " but how could I tell her... " he went on and Mrs. Beufont could not find the heart to break up his narrative to seek for clarification. That would come later, she told herself even though she was quite hard-pressed with curiosity to find out what his parents had threatened him with, that had broken this young man so. "... So I committed a crime of my own, I thought, I felt that maybe it would change something, do something? but it ruined everything. It ruined her and she could no longer face me. Sometimes I think I did it to make her hate me, to push her away, other times I think I wanted a good enough reason to stay away from her. I just don't know!" he said in exasperation. "I just know that I never wanted to hurt her. " "What did you do Ryan?" Mrs. Beufont asked when he finally trailed off. The young looked troubled and for his own sake, the woman hoped that it was not something that would cost him his freedom. "I can't even speak of it." he said his lips turning up as they curled up with disgust at his thoughts. "Can you tell me if she's okay then?" she asked holding her breath not able to anticipate what she would be hearing next. "I like to think that she's fine. The last time I saw her she seemed happy and my son now has a strong stable figure that he can call father." he replied with a lost expression in his eyes. "Oh, Ryan!" the woman's heart went out to him and for the first time, Ryan looked up surprised that a total stranger could care so much about his hurt and the pain he had gone through.