Chapter 5

--------- I stood rooted to the ground, staring at the being in front of me that I had now identified as my other half. It was as if the world had stopped and Gabriel and I were the only two in existence. I could feel my Wolf's triumphant howling and leaps of joy but I remained riveted by my Mate's stare. His eyes were so incredibly dark that they were nearly black, matching the color of his hair and contributing to his intimidating appearance. Yet, in this moment, I could read every expression on his face. I saw shock and disbelief that were so strong that they completely overshadowed any other emotions in his gaze. His mouth was slightly open as if he had been about to say something when he realized who I was. The recognition was definitely there as I knew it would be, but the strength of his disbelief was astounding to me. He was beautiful, perfect, a god-like creature that was unrivaled. I knew my Wolf was encouraging these thoughts but I had to agree. I had never seen anything so wonderful. Every nerve in my body was on fire and my heart was beating rapidly. And yet, amidst these happy thoughts that surfaced whenever a wolf found their mate, the discordant notes of my distrust and hatred for Gabriel remained, marring the experience. This was my mate? The most horrible tyrant on the continent was my other half? What did that say about me? Why was it him? I could sense my own disbelief present on my face. My Wolf snarled at my deprecating thoughts of her Mate. I could feel her powerful emotions for him threatening to overwhelm my own. All of these things registered in a few short seconds, and then the magic of the mating bond made itself known as a silver sheen began to appear in Gabriel's black eyes. I felt the magic of werewolves coursing through my veins as my expression mirrored his. Any doubt that remained for either of us was now erased. This silver tinge always appeared in a werewolf's eyes shortly after they recognized their Mate for the first time, although the discoloration was brief and temporary. It was the physical manifestation of the recognition of the bond. Dimly, I registered the shocked intakes of breath from the wolves around us that just now realized what was going on. Surely they were as surprised as we were that Gabriel had found his mate in the enemy pack. 'Skylar? SKYLAR?' I heard my father shouting in my mind but for once I pushed it aside, focusing on Gabriel as my whirlwind of emotions continued. I immediately set up a mental barrier so I wouldn't hear the distracting voices of my pack members; it was too much right now. Half of me wanted to leap at him right then and there, shifting into my wolf form. Many pairs consummated the mating process as soon as they met, and there was no denying that my body was burning as I registered that the god-like creature in front of me belonged to me. But the other half of me was contrasting sharply with this as my fear and dislike of Gabriel remained. I was still trying to accept the fact that this powerful and terrible werewolf was my Mate. "No....it can't be..." Gabriel finally spoke, quietly, but I knew those around me would be able to hear. The werewolves in the clearing still hadn't moved, and I wondered if he had Commanded them to remain still. Disbelief colored his husky tone deeply and he remained rooted to the spot. A strange expression lingered in the depths of his eyes now. It was something almost akin to....awe? I noticed that he was trembling slightly and I wondered if he was restraining his Wolf. The Alpha mating pull was stronger than a normal one, and I had to admire his self-restraint. No self-restraint! Shift! My Wolf articulated in my mind as she pushed lustful impulses into me. I shook as I resisted my urges. No, I couldn't do it now. I still felt my intense dislike for him despite my simultaneous desire to let him Claim me. My natural mating instincts warred with my better judgment as I continued to stare at him, not saying a word. It was as if I was completely divided in half and I felt a slight ache in my chest as I continued to resist my natural urge to approach him. I was about to lose control. My Wolf was snarling at me. I had to get out now. I knew it was cowardly and pathetic, but I needed to think, and I couldn't with my Mate so close. If I joined with Gabriel now, I would be turning against my family and my pack, and I couldn't do that. But I couldn't trust my own judgment so close to him. I knew that running away might insult him, but either rejecting him on the spot or Claiming him would be so much worse in this moment. I had to get out of here. With every ounce of mental force in my mind, I roughly shoved my Wolf's impulses to the back of my conscious and wrenched my gaze from Gabriel's. His scent still imposed upon my senses but I was free of his black eyes now. It had to be now. Before I did something I may regret later. I had to think clearly and remember what a horrible creature he was. My human side wanted to reject him, which would probably make him snap and take it out on my pack. My Wolf wanted him as hers, and she wanted to Claim him, which would effectively result in my betrayal of my own pack. How could I make that decision in an instant? With that thought powering me on, I knew I had to get some distance away from Gabri-the Alpha. I couldn't shift to wolf form or my Wolf would take over. Instead, I forced my feet to move and utilized my werewolf speed to dash away from Gabriel and the rest of the pack, heading towards the woods. The branches and leaves whizzed by as I entered the fringe, part of me hoping he would follow and the other half praying he wouldn't. I felt a strangled sound escape my throat as I defied nature and ran away from my Mate. Despite my hatred, I felt a sharp pang in my chest and I clutched it as I sped through the trees. It felt like part of me was pulling out of my chest as I left him behind. My Wolf was howling her fury and grief in the back of my mind; You're a coward! You left our Mate! OUR MATE! She was roaring, and I whimpered softly. I was a coward. But how could I stay there? How could I stand there and want to be with such a cruel person? Why had nature given me Gabriel as a Mate? Was there something wrong with me? I was completely ordinary, yet my 'other half' was anything but. Maybe we are supposed to balance him out, my Wolf snapped. You hated him two minutes ago! I retorted sharply. She growled in aggravation. I panted as my frantic run continued, thorns ripping at my skin as I paid no heed to obstacles around me, bursting through in a crazed fashion. Inside I cowered and winced at the pain. The bond wasn't being broken but putting distance between you and your Mate after your first meeting wasn't supposed to happen. I was denying nature her greatest gift. I was a horrible werewolf. But I couldn't do that to my pack. I couldn't be their worst enemy's Mate. What would my family say? Did Gabriel even want me? He had been resisting the urge to Shift and Claim, also. He may have been disgusted by nature's choice of a Mate, since I was from the pack he considered as weak. Surprisingly enough, I felt a sharp pain in my chest at that thought, and then knew I was being a hypocrite. I was the one that ran. I finally slowed down when I realized I had no idea where I was going. Panting, I lowered my pace as I heard a trickling stream nearby. I knew I would be easy to track, and was unsure if I should cross here. I could now think more clearly despite the pain in my chest and my Wolf's growls in my mind. She was angry but she'd adjust. She would have to. Why did you leave him? His Wolf wanted us! She whined, her sadness clouding her tone and almost completely masking the anger that simmered underneath.