Chapter 5

The next second, Sienna seemed to snap under the shock. She spun around and ran, sobbing as she fled. Julian's expression changed in an instant. He pulled away from Trina so quickly that she barely had time to react. He told her to wait, then sprinted after Sienna without a second's hesitation. Trina slid down the cold wall until she was sitting on the floor. There was still a sticky, raw ache between her legs. How ironic. The woman he really loved had only caught a glimpse of them, and he had abandoned her in an instant to chase Sienna down. What did he think she was? Some cheap prostitute he had picked up for the night? Trina forced herself to stand and smoothed down her twisted dress. Having lost her usual spark, she moved step by step out of that disgusting corner like a puppet with its strings cut. She had just stepped out the back door of the club when a shout rang out overhead. "Somebody jumped!" Trina looked up just in time to see a dark figure plunging from the upper floor, dropping straight toward her. There was a sickening thud as the body hit her full on. Pain exploded through her entire body. Something warm and thick splashed across her face and clothes. Right before the darkness swallowed her, she caught a blurred glimpse of the face that had crashed into her. It was Sienna, her face still streaked with tears. ... When Trina woke up again, the world smelled like antiseptic. She drifted in and out as people rushed her down a hallway. The lights above her blurred, and a nurse's urgent voice cut through the fog in her head. "Both of them are in critical condition! They're bleeding from the head, and they have multiple fractures. But we just took in a bunch of highway collision victims. The blood bank is nearly empty and there's only one operating room left. If we delay surgery for one of them, she might not make it. General Hauser, who do we operate on first?" The next thing Trina heard was Julian's voice, rough and strained. "Save them both. Can't we transfer one of them to another hospital?" "No, General Hauser! In their condition, they can't be moved! You have to make a decision!" Silence fell, so heavy that it hurt to breathe. Trina forced her eyes open a crack and saw Julian at the doors of the operating room, his jaw clenched hard. He looked utterly conflicted in a way she had never seen him before. At last, as if using every ounce of his strength, he forced the words out, one by one. "Operate on... Sienna first." Trina already knew the truth. She had told herself not to expect anything, but hearing him say it out loud with her own ears still made her feel like her heart was being crushed into dust. And somehow, she laughed. Her lips curled under the oxygen mask into the faintest, coldest hint of a smile. So, in the end, he chose Sienna. Then, the darkness took Trina again. She had no idea how long she was out before she slowly woke up a second time. When her vision cleared, she saw Julian sitting beside her bed. The moment he saw her eyes open, he leaned over her. "You're awake? How do you feel? Are you hurting anywhere?" Trina turned her head away, dodging his hand. "Didn't you already decide my life didn't matter when you chose to save Sienna first outside the operating room? Why pretend you're worried now?" Julian clearly hadn't expected her to have heard any of that. His body went rigid. He stayed quiet for a very long time—long enough that Trina almost believed he wasn't going to answer at all. "Sienna used to be attached to the unit with the performing arts troupe," he finally said. "Then, she got seriously ill. Her body's been weak ever since. In that situation, if she hadn't gone into surgery immediately, she would've died on the table. That's why I chose to save her first." He paused, then looked back at Trina. "After that, I called other hospitals and tried to find an available operating room so you could go into surgery in time too. Trin, I didn't abandon you." She listened to his explanation, her face utterly calm. Inside, everything felt like a frozen wasteland. She let out a short, humorless laugh. "If she was just someone from your unit, just a fragile subordinate who needed looking after, then why did she fall apart when she saw us together? Why would she jump?" Julian fell silent again. She saw his Adam's apple bob as he swallowed, and only after a long while did he speak in a low, deep voice. "Sienna once had someone she loved, but they couldn't be together. She never recovered from it, and her emotions have been unstable ever since. Seeing us that night must have overwhelmed her." Trina watched him quietly, studying the hard cut of his jaw and his calm, unreadable eyes. She hadn't realized until then how good he was at lying. Trina clearly remembered how, not long after they got married, she had been curled up against his chest, toying with the buttons on his uniform as she said, "Julian, I can't stand liars. My mother spent her whole life drowning in my father's lies and it killed her in the end. If you ever lie to me, I'll walk away without looking back." He had kissed the top of her head and said hoarsely, "I won't lie to you." But now, it was one lie after another. For Trina, love had always been something extra—nice to have, but never something she couldn't live without. If it worked, they would stay together. If it didn't, she would move on. And if moving on didn't work, she could still live a beautiful life on her own. So, the moment she knew for certain that Julian had lied to her, he was already gone from her world.