19

Rai Did he just say he’s going to consummate our marriage? Yup, I think he did. I’m stunned into a long silence at his words, my limbs staying still and my hold on his shirt loosening. For some reason, my chest rises and falls heavily, and it has nothing to do with the adrenaline rush from earlier. I stare at his face as he carries me, like, really stare at him—at the sharp lines of his jaw, his straight nose with the slight crookedness that makes him imperfect in so many ways, the man who became my husband because I agreed to it. At that moment when the priest asked me to be his wife till death do us part, the past crashed into me and all I wanted to do was to run and never return. My heart still bleeds from back then, and I didn’t trust that I could let it exsanguinate this time. Because now? Now, I have a feeling he will hurt me irrevocably if I let him. By the time I shake myself out of my reverie, he’s reached his car and has opened the passenger door. I squirm in his hold, needin