Chapter 105

I had opened up at the funeral. I said a few words before they buried her, though my speech was nothing significant, Mr & Mrs. S still smiled and said thank you. It made me feel good in a sense. Because for once in my life, I felt like I was finally doing something right. And I wasn't doing to make others happy, I was doing it because I wanted to be happy. At the end of the day, after the funeral was done, I felt better. And as I went to sleep that night, no nightmares of sort plagued me.  Though as the days passed, I had my moments of weakness and perhaps vulnerability, and I let those moments happen, no matter how much I loathed it. Because I knew if I didn't, the thought of Anna's death being my fault would ultimately loom in my mind. I was sure I would drive myself crazy if I held those emotions in, so I let them out. Just when I was alone, of course. I hadn't taken that big of a step and actully turned to someone in my moments of desperation.